


Forever & Always

by wallflowerchronicles



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, Japan, Las Vegas, M/M, Marriage Proposal, grand canyon - Freeform, sometimes I actually write fluff okay?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-07
Updated: 2015-09-07
Packaged: 2018-04-19 16:06:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4752497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wallflowerchronicles/pseuds/wallflowerchronicles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Dan and Phil visit the Grand Canyon during their Las Vegas trip in 2012, an unexpected question arrises. Then life happens, and it's not addressed again until they go to Japan in 2015.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forever & Always

**Author's Note:**

> Because I'll never be over Japhan (and also that one time that D+P visited my home state for a few hours even though I didn't know about it at the time). 
> 
> Thanks to [herecomesthesun14](http://herecomesthesun14.tumblr.com) for beta-ing!

**June, 2012**

The early morning sun swept over the desert landscape, and Dan shut his eyes tightly in a futile effort to block out its rays. Dan loved being on holiday, but he did not enjoy waking up at 7am to partake in traditional touristy activities. And yet, he had once again been persuaded to do so. Phil wanted to see the Grand Canyon, and so they were already awake and aboard a bus that had left Las Vegas at 7:30.

“Look Dan, it’s Lake Mead,” Phil said, gently nudging Dan with his elbow. “It’s so blue!” Dan wanted to tell Phil to shut the hell up and let him go back to sleep, but instead, he opened his eyes. He had to agree that the lake was some of the bluest water he’d ever seen. “We’ll be passing by the Hoover Dam soon,” Phil added. “Where’s the camera? We should film this.”

Dan groaned in protest, but then bent forward to rummage through their shared backpack at his feet. He eventually found the small red camera, which he handed to Phil. He hoped his boyfriend would understand that he simply wasn’t awake enough to bother with it himself.

Phil turned the camera on and began zooming in on the view out the window. Not thirty seconds later, the camera beeped a few times and turned itself off. “I think the battery died,” Phil announced after two futile attempts to turn it back on. “Did you bring the spare?”

Dan sighed and shook his head ‘no’. Phil knew better than to press the issue, and instead returned his attention to reading the Scott Pilgrim novel he’d brought along on the trip.

About an hour later, the bus stopped for a short break in the parking lot of a Safeway grocery store Kingman, Arizona. Blessedly, the bus driver announced that there was a Starbucks inside.

The caffeine from his iced caramel macchiato began to kick in just after they were back on the road, and Dan felt truly awake for the first time all morning. “I’m sorry that I forgot to charge the camera battery, it was stupid of me,” he turned and said to Phil.

“It’s okay, Dan,” he responded. “Maybe today should just be for us,” he added a few moments later. “We are on holiday, after all.”

As they neared their destination, Dan marveled at the change in scenery. They had clearly left the desert behind and entered an area of dense forest.

“I didn’t expect it to be so green,” he commented. “I thought the canyon was rocky and dry like the desert.”

“Well, there is a river at the bottom of it,” Phil reminded him. “And we’ve gone up in elevation, I think.”

After entering the gates of the national park, they passed through Grand Canyon Village, which appeared to include at least one hotel, a shuttle bus stop, and a dining hall. Further on, they spotted a large barn next to a pen full of mules. Phil had read online that people rode the mules along incredible narrow trails down into the canyon. The idea intrigued Dan, but he knew that Phil was much too afraid of heights to even be persuaded to try it.

The bus let them off at the visitor center, and they were told they had two hours to explore the canyon. It seemed that everyone elected to bypass the gift shop and information center and head straight for the trails, eager to catch their first glimpse of the wonder that they had traveled so far to see. Dan and Phil followed suit.

The sheer magnitude of the sight before him was enough to halt Dan in his tracks. The canyon was so wide that the opposite rim seemed miles and miles away. And its width was nothing compared to its depth. The river below was a tiny ribbon of blue winding its way through the desert cliffs. Dan’s eyes felt strained from looking down at it as though he were looking at an optical illusion.

Dan turned to his right, looking for Phil, but found that he had stopped several paces back from the railing where only the upper part of the far wall was visible.

“Come on, you’ve got to see this,” Dan pleaded. Careless of who might be watching, he grabbed Phil’s hand and gently pulled him forward.

“Dan, you know I don’t like heights,” Phil protested.

“Trust me, you _have_ to look down, it’s amazing! And look, the railing’s not even right at the edge.”

After a bit of further persuasion, Phil walked forward, still clutching Dan’s hand. Once the full extent of the canyon came into view, Phil stared silently for several minutes, his lips slightly parted in awe.

“Let’s go over there,” Phil suggested, pointing to a nearby observation point that had been fenced off on an area of rock that jutted out into the canyon.

Mather Point, as it was called, was rather crowded due to its close proximity to the visitor center, but Phil didn’t seem to mind.

“How did a river make all of this?” Phil marveled as they stood near the far railing. Dan was busy emulating all of the other tourists by snapping photos with his iPhone.

Dan paused to think for a moment, than simply said, “Time, I guess." 

They decided to walk along the trail toward Yavapai Point, and planned to turn back in time to grab some lunch before returning to the bus.

“I know I was being kind of a pain in the arse on the bus earlier, but I’m really glad that you convinced me to come here,” Dan said after they had walked about half a mile.

Phil responded by saying, “I’m really glad that you got me to look over the edge.”

Dan and Phil were mostly quiet after that, still mesmerized by the view to their right. The park seemed to be filled with visitors from all over the world. Of course, there were a large number of American accents to be heard, but they heard many other accents and many other languages along the trail as well. They passed a group of teenagers speaking Korean, a young man and woman speaking French, and a family of Australians. The family walking behind them was speaking English as well, but with Swedish accents.

Yavapai Point turned out to be a much smaller observation area accessible only by a steep, narrow set of steps with no railing on either side. Dan knew that Phil could never be persuaded to climb down onto the platform, so he went alone.

This particular area offered one of the best views from the south rim because of the way the canyon curved slightly to the south on either side. It felt like standing on the bow of a ship surrounded by an ocean of jagged rock walls. Dan was struck how different various areas of the canyon’s cliffs looked because of the shadows cast by their own twists and turns. While some were bright shades of yellow and orange, others were deep hues of purple and brown. He took a few more photos, and then decided to head back up to rejoin Phil.

Suddenly, the people around him were whispering, and they had shifted their focus away from the canyon. Dan turned to see what had happened, and immediately spotted the cause of the commotion. In the opposite corner of the observation platform, a man knelt on one knee in front of a young woman. She began to cry when her boyfriend opened the small box to reveal the engagement ring within. They were both athletic-looking and incredibly tan, the sort of people that might enjoy hiking to the bottom of the canyon and back over along weekend.

Dan felt incredibly awkward about being so near such an intimate moment between two total strangers. He looked up toward where Phil was standing, but saw that his escape route was clogged by onlookers who had stopped to stare and congratulate the couple. The crowd clapped as the man stood up to kiss his fiancé, and Dan half-heartedly clapped along with them, not wanting to seem terribly rude.

“That was adorable,” Phil declared once the crowd had thinned out and Dan had finally been able to make his way back up the stairs. Everyone around them seemed to be expressing similar sentiments, but Dan remained a bit sour. He couldn’t help but think that all of these strangers wouldn’t have been so receptive to a very public proposal between two men, or two women for that matter. But maybe he was just being overly pessimistic.

They decided to take a break from the hot sun and explore the tiny Yavapai Museum of Geology before heading back toward the visitor center and the bus. Phil seemed genuinely intrigued by the small exhibits explaining how the canyon had formed over millions of years. Dan was more interested in the scale model of the canyon and the long row of windows that looked out over the real thing.

Phil purchased a few post cards that featured aerial views of the canyon, and they decided that it was time to head back.

As they walked to the east, Dan found himself once again thinking about how boring his life would likely be without Phil in it. He probably never would have come to the Grand Canyon if it weren’t for Phil. Hell, he probably wouldn’t even by a Youtuber, or certainly not a successful one. Life with Phil was fully of crazy, yet wonderful adventures. And sure, those adventures sometimes involved waking up at ungodly early hours, but he wouldn’t trade it for the world.

They made it back to the visitor center with time to spare, and found themselves leaning against the trail railing for a final few minutes.

“What are you thinking about?” Dan asked, realizing how quiet they had both been.

“That couple, actually,” Phil said. _Crap_ , Dan thought _, I shouldn’t have asked._ “I’m a little jealous of them, I think,” added Phil.

Now that, Dan had not been expecting.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dan’s mind skipped to horrible conclusions, like how it would be easier for Phil to date a girl, to marry a girl, to tell the Internet about this hypothetical girl…

“I know that we’re not ready yet, but when we are… if I ask you then, will you marry me, Dan?”

Dan stood in stunned silence, his eyes scanning Phil’s face, trying to decide if he was being serious or not.

“I… you don’t have to answer that,” Phil added, clearly taking Dan’s shock as a bad sign. “I shouldn’t have put you on the spot. I don’t have a ring or anything, I didn’t mean it to be anything official.”

“No, it’s okay! I was just surprised is all,” Dan explained quickly. He felt his heart beat faster and faster, the excitement coursing through his veins. “Of course I’ll marry you!”

“Really?” Phil asked, his eyes wide with joy.

“Yeah! I mean, like you said, I don’t think we’re quite ready for that just yet, but I know that we will be some day. I’ve never been half as happy as I am with you. Of course I want to spend the rest of our lives together.”

Phil pulled him into a tight embrace, his arms looped around Dan’s shoulders, one hand in his hair. “I love you so much,” he said softly.

“I love you, too,” Dan affirmed before pressing a kiss against Phil’s neck.

 

 

But things were not always as simple as they had seemed that day under the Arizona sun. As their subscriber counts grew, it became increasingly difficult for Dan and Phil to keep their relationship private.

Dan feared what might happen if they were outed, especially after they moved to London and started working for the BBC on a regular basis. He began insisting that he met Phil through a mutual friend and answered a vehement ‘no’ whenever he was asked if he was gay. Technically it wasn’t a lie, but Dan’s overtly defensive attitude certainly put a strain on their relationship.

Getting married was the last thing on Dan’s mind.

In 2014, this attitude gradually started to change. It began with their producer’s insistence that they let loose and be more of themselves on the radio. When nothing disastrous happened, they adapted the idea to their videos as well. Their audience responded even better than expected. Collabs became genuinely fun again. Dan and Phil had never been closer.

But where did that leave the marriage situation?

Phil had said that he hadn’t meant for that first proposal to be anything official, so Dan assumed that he would ask again some day. By early 2015, Dan was starting to think that Phil really should have asked by now. Did he still think they weren’t ready? Was he just waiting for the right moment? Then one day, it finally occurred to Dan that maybe he didn’t have to wait for Phil. Maybe he should be the one to propose. After everything that had happened, it wasn’t such a stretch to imagine that maybe Phil was unsure of Dan’s feelings on the topic of marriage. Maybe it was up to Dan to make the next move.

Searching for a ring felt like a top-secret mission. Shopping online was obviously the safest option, since he dare not risk running into a subscriber in a jewelry store. Dan found the perfect one a few days after they returned from Playlist Live. It was a simple, yet elegant platinum band. The only problem that remained was finding the right moment.

They’d just been so busy, really. They were still finishing up their book, still working on the 7 Second Challenge app, all while still doing their radio show and making their own videos. “You know what we should do?” Phil asked randomly one day. “We should take a break from all of this and go to Japan.”

They’d both wanted to visit Japan for years. It was perfect. 

Tokyo was a dream come true. The chaotic energy of the city reminded them a bit of New York, but it was not unlike Las Vegas as well.

At Mimei and Duncan’s recommendation, they devoted one day of their trip to visiting Mt. Fuji and nearby Hakone. 

First, they took a train out of Tokyo, then a bus up Mt. Fuji itself to an elevation of 2020 meters. The air was incredibly cold for late April, and there was still snow on the ground.

Dan discovered that the gift shop sold cans of Fuji air for 800¥, which was such a ridiculous concept that he just had to buy one. Duncan mocked him for the frivolous purchase, which Phil agreed that Dan deserved.

Later, they took a ferry across Lake Kawaguchi toward Hakone. It was then that Mt. Fuji finally appeared from behind the clouds. The snow-capped mountain was mesmerizingly massive. The wispy clouds that still clung to its peak shrouded it in mystery.

They rode the Hakone Ropeway from the lakeshore up to Hakone’s natural hot springs. The gondola system was similar to an overgrown ski lift, with each car holding up to 18 people. The views were incredible. Dan grabbed hold of Phil’s hand knowing that Phil probably wasn’t having such a pleasant time so high in the air.

When they reached Hakone, Mimei explained that the hot springs, or onsen, there are traditionally thought to have healing properties. Dan suggested that they explore the area a bit. On cue, Mimei and Duncan elected to stay behind and film a few clips for Mimei’s vlog about the eggs cooked in the onsen that could supposedly give you 7 extra years of life. 

So Dan and Phil climbed up the path to the vista point alone. At the top, they were greeted with another breathtaking view of Mt. Fuji. Dan stopped a few paces behind Phil to snap a photo of his boyfriend admiring the view. Maybe that would make a good Instagram post for later.

Dan put his phone away and walked up to Phil, wrapping his arms around him from behind. “Hi,” said Dan playfully.

“Hi,”

“I love you so much,” Dan began after taking a deep breath.

“I love you too, Dan,” Phil interjected.

“I have something for you, but it’s a surprise,” Dan continued. He let go of Phil’s waste and stepped around to face him. “Close your eyes for a sec, okay?”

To Dan’s surprise, Phil obeyed without questioning him. Dan knelt down and pulled the ring from his pocket. “I know that things have gotten a bit complicated in the last few years, and that things have changed, but I also know that I still want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“Dan…”

“Shh, let me finish. You can open your eyes now.” Phil saw the ring and gasped. “Will you marry me?” Dan asked nervously.

Phil sank to his knees and cupped Dan’s face with his hands before kissing him fervently. Dan returned the embrace, carful not to drop the ring.

“Is that a yes?” Dan asked after breaking away.

“That’s a yes.”

Dan slipped the platinum band onto Phil’s finger, and they paused for a brief moment, smiling at each other like love-sick teenagers.

A congratulatory cheer could be heard from half way down the hill where Duncan and Mimei had been hiding.  

“Did you film that?” Phil asked as they walked toward their friends.

“Oh yes,” Mimei admitted.

“On a separate sim card just for you,” added Duncan. “Our lips are sealed, we saw nothing.”

Phil turned to Dan and shook his head in amazement. 

In the early evening, they returned to the Hakone Ropeway station to begin their journey back to Tokyo. When the next gondola arrived, it turned out that there weren’t quite enough seats for everyone. “You guys go on, we’ll catch up with you at the bottom,” Phil said to Mimei and Duncan.

As luck would have it, Dan and Phil ended up having the next gondola all to themselves. 

“This reminds me a bit of the Manchester Eye,” Phil commented, leaning his head against Dan’s shoulder as the mountain scenery flew by outside. Dan put his arm around his ~~boyfriend~~ fiancé and hummed in agreement. “Do you think that 2009 us would ever believe everything that’s happened since then? That we’re here? That we’re engaged?” 

“I don’t even think that 2012 us would really believe it, at least not 2012 me.”

“That’s okay, though. I like proving past us wrong. I like doing things beyond our wildest dreams.” Phil paused for a few moments. “I always imagined that I would be the one to propose, but having you do it instead was a pleasant surprise. 

“That’s how I always imagined it, too, until recently. But if that’s how you imagined it, how come you never asked?”

“You only beat me to it by a few days at the most,” Phil told him with a small laugh. Dan felt like his heart skipped a beat as Phil produced a ring box from the pocket of his galaxy jacket. Inside was a black ring edged with silver metal on both sides.

“It’s gorgeous!” Dan exclaimed, running his finger over the inlaid black zirconium that dominated the face of the titanium band.

“You already asked me to marry you, so I guess I’ll ask something slightly different. Will you love me forever and always?”

“Those words mean the same thing, Phil.”

“Shut up!”

“Of course I will, until the end of time.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I'm [wallflowerchronicles](http://wallflowerchronicles.tumblr.com/) on tumblr by the way. Come say hi!
> 
> ((comments are much appreciated))


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